23rd Sunday after Pentecost 

November 8, 2020

“Runaway Groom”

St. Matthew 25:1-13

 

Weddings are emotional events.  Weddings...how many of you have ever planned a wedding? There are so many things to consider: time of the year - date; place - outdoor or indoor? Will it be at a church? Is a pastor or officiate available?

Bridesmaids...bridegrooms? What kind of reception are we going to have? Rehearsal...rehearsal dinner? Who to invite ... Uncle Nick who we only met once or cousin Jim who we've known since childhood? There is so much planning going into a wedding.  Than the wedding happens and it goes by in a blur!  So much preparation for the ceremony and few hours of celebration!  Of course it is worth it and the memories and stories will linger for years to come.

Most marriages at the time of Jesus were prearranged. The idea of falling in love, dating, and choosing your spouse is quite modern. Matchmakers were part of the Hebrew tradition.

Women were traded like property neither individual had a say in selecting her or his mate. Fathers of brides would present a dowry along with their daughter - goods or property that would secure the promises of the wedding vow. One married into families – the newly married couple became an extension of the family which the father or patriarch ruled.

Weddings in Jesus’ day were familial events and every bit as emotional as in our day.  Guests gathered at the home of the bride and were entertained by her parents while waiting for the groom.  When the bridegroom approached, the guests, including the bridesmaids lit torches and went out to greet the groom.  Then the entire party would process to the groom’s home where his parents were waiting.  The ceremony took place at the groom’s home followed by an extended banquet accommodating the guests for several days.

It is not unusual for Jesus to create a story from this rich tradition.  God’s people often compared their relationship with God as bride and groom.  The Messianic feast was to be like a wedding banquet.  So this vivid imagery would be in the hearts of the people that Jesus is teaching. 

God’s reign – participating in God’s rule is like a wedding where the bridesmaids await the coming of the groom.  But Jesus adds a twist – the groom is delayed – the runaway groom does not arrive in a timely fashion – leaving the wedding party in the lurch to wait and wait.  5 bridesmaids wait in readiness with extra oil for their lamps and 5 do not have extra oil – and why should they – any responsible groom would arrive in a timely fashion.  But not this ‘runaway groom’ – no he is delayed.

This strange twist in this story would be a cause for discussion and debate among the folks who heard this parable.  What’s up with this runaway groom? 

The parables of Jesus often had an edge to them.  He’d take something ordinary and put a twist in it to grab people’s attention and have them ask what is going on.

Again – the end of this parable is also unusual and strange – why would the groom not let in those who were delayed because of him.  Had he been on time they would have been at the ceremony and party?  This strange ending of sending the 5 bridesmaids away would certainly lead to lots of debate and discussion among those who first heard this parable.  Why?  What?  What is up with this runaway groom?

In the movie “Runaway Bride” Maggie Carpenter is a spirited and attractive young woman who has had a number of unsuccessful relationships. Maggie, nervous of being married, has left a trail of fiancés. She's left three men waiting for her at the altar on their wedding day (all of which are caught on tape); receiving tabloid fame and the dubious nickname "The Runaway Bride".

The groom in Jesus’ parable is a ‘runaway’ groom who delays the wedding – some are prepared for such a delay – others who certainly expected the groom to be on time are not prepared and miss out on the feast.

This is a strange parable.  Matthew is the only gospel writer who records it.  This parable is unique to the Gospel according to Matthew.  Matthew is writing to a Jewish group of the early followers of Christ.  They have seen the destruction of Jerusalem and are expecting Christ to return in their generation and time. 

They are experiencing loss and grief and a major transition.  Christ is no longer around and his return is delayed and now a central aspect of their faith – the Temple and Jerusalem lay in ruin.  

So these early followers are asking ‘What’s up with this runaway groom?’  Our hopes are dashed by his delay, our city and temple lay in ruin.  Who are we as we follow Christ?  Why has not the groom returned?

The ‘runaway groom’ has not returned.  You and I are like bridesmaids awaiting divine intervention.  Each Sunday we pray – ‘your kingdom come.’ 

So what do we do with this delay – the runaway groom? 

This parable gives the listener two options:  live in fear and run out of oil – or live in faith and hope keeping enough oil on hand for your lamps no matter when the bridegroom appears. 

We live in a time of fear – Covid 19.  The President has some hyped up fear of riots in suburbs.  Many  congregations are in transition. There are major changes and challenges ahead.  As individuals we may be facing serious surgery, job loss, loss of a loved one. 

In the midst of it all the good news is that the runaway groom is on his way – that the bridegroom is already here and continues to come among us:

Jesus continues to come when God’s people live in hope and never give up.

The runaway groom comes when faithful followers of Christ express love and compassion and work for justice.

Jesus comes when critically ill people are surrounded by their faithful friends and they know that they are ultimately safe in God’s love.

The runaway groom arrives when we live in hope and give ourselves to the work of the kingdom. 

Christ enters into our lives here and now.  God is present to you today in word, in the sacrament – ‘given and shed for you for the forgiveness of sin’, in the person sitting next to you.

Living in hope does not translate into immunity from the harsh realities of life.  Living in hope means that we will resupply our oil reserves each week through gathering in worship.  

Living in hope means that through transitions and change we live confidently, expectantly, trusting in the Lord of history who continues to come into our lives with compassion. 

We live ‘in the meantime’ – ‘in the between time’ – the runaway groom is already here but not yet fully arrived.  We have God’s word of promise and the assurance of the Divine Presence in the sacrament.  We gather as part of the body of Christ present to each other and sharing our mutual joy and sorrows. 

Light your lamp, open your eyes, roll up your sleeves and work for the kingdom as it continues to break into our lives.

Amen.